Choose to get bitter or better.. Martha has chosen to be bitter with things. She complained about the things she had to do and blamed everyone for not helping, including Jesus. It wasn't long before i realise i was her replica.
Well, the new year came and people are starting school and brand new work weeks. It gives hope and a future for those who involve such scenes- curious children eager for school and unflagging streams of working class grappling with coffee and makeup on trains. I felt stuck in the middle. All waiting processes are like that i guess. A long wait before your destiny gets nailed. But what if you already know what it is going to be..
Jesus felt sorrowful when he went away to pray three times because he knew he was going to die. His soul was overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death! He knew everything from the betrayal to his resurrection and sought the Lord for refuge. He asked for his cup to be taken from him the first time. Was it truly taken away from him? He still had to die, to go through the whole process of crucifixion and rise from the grave again. But now that He was raised from the dead, restored to God, who would have said his load was not taken from him then?
I say yes! His cup was taken from him the second time he went away and his conviction was hammered the third time he returned. He was deeply shaken by his death the first time he went away to pray. He asked if it is possible, may the cup be taken from him, 'yet not as i will, but as you will.' (God, i love Jesus. Everything about him is so perfect. Even his weakness revealed is remembered to be assured to have You in first place.) Then he told his disciples, the God-chosen men to keep watch, 'Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing but the body is weak.' Why would he say that? My guess is that he was also feeling the fatigue from all the baggage but warns others to tell himself too, that he must keep on.
He went away a second time and prayed, 'My Father, if it is not possible for this cup to be taken away unless I drink it, may your will be done.' Wow! What peace has been found from a Lord that answers. 'May your will be done', i use to think it sounds like resignation but this is in fact a powerful resolution. One that shows the willingness to drive totally in a divine will of our God's. One that rise from the acknowledgment that if things had to go this way, because You want it, because I may have caused it, maybe even because someone has plotted against me, I will still follow His way.
The third time he went and said the same thing, it was already a confirmation in mind and soul. He returned and said to his disciples: 'Rise, let us go! Here comes my betrayer!'. Jesus was ready to face what Judas had for him. He didn't say 'There goes my betrayer!', he said 'Here comes'. He declares let us go, a tone of anticipation even. Jesus demonstrated what spiritual fitness is all about.
It is like exercise, it's a constant movement of taking in energy from God and then having a deep knowing that everything will be all right. Now, despite the new year has come and i don't know what is to come, may it be bad or really bad, come what may.
posted by me @ 12:05 pm
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